YOUR PERCEPTIONS SHAPE YOUR LIFE
How you see and take in information affects your life. Your version of a past situation with a sibling or friend may be quite different than theirs. Some differences may be small. Others can be quite large and present completely different details of the story.
Are your perceptions helping or hindering you?
Your Perceptions are influenced by Your Personality
Your personality determines how you interpret information. Were you a sensitive child? Did you take things to heart? Or were you a bit more self-centered and able to rebuff feelings? You view events and situations through your own unique personality filter that shapes your perception of the world.
Your Perceptions are influenced by Events in Your Life
How you perceive things can be greatly influenced by events in your life. Both good and bad events can influence how you view the world and how you make decisions.
Consider these two cases. Both of my clients had difficult childhoods and mothers who were diagnosed as suffering from Mental Illness.
The case of Client X:
• Client X’s mother had emotionally abandoned her at an early age.
• Client X grew up feeling unloved, helpless and alone.
• Client X developed a ‘victim’ type personality.
• Client X subsequently married partners that were neglectful, abusive and unsupportive.
• Client X believed she was unworthy and that her life couldn’t change.
• Client X realized she needed help when her perceptions started affecting her work.
Client X needed to realize that the perceptions she had about herself, her work and her relationships were greatly influenced by the relationship, or lack of relationship, that she’d had with her mother. Once she understood she could be loved and not feel helpless she quickly shed the victim role her perceptions had allowed her to take on and started to change her life for the better.
The Case of Client Y:
• Client Y’s mother spent her clear moments loving her and emphasizing an education.
• Client Y often took care of her mother through a difficult childhood and was often embarrassed by her mother’s behavior.
• Client Y developed a ‘warrior’ type personality.
• Client Y made sure life didn’t get the better of her by getting a good education and a well-respected job.
• Client Y often viewed people as passing judgment because of her mother.
• Client Y closed off people so she wouldn’t feel hurt and found intimacy issues difficult.
Client Y needed to realize that the perceptions she’d created about people passing judgment on her mother were perhaps unfounded. Once she could lower her guard and remove the wall of perceptions she’d created to protect her feelings, she was able to allow someone to enter her life.
You may not have had a difficult childhood. But you likely did have both good and bad experiences that will continue to shape your future. If you consistently end up with the same unsatisfying and possibly contentious results, it might be time for some self-reflection and a perception check. Shift your perceptions and you may very well be able to the shift the outcome of a situation to your advantage. Make sure your perceptions help, not hinder your endeavors.
For more information on my services please see http://www.drlorikay.com
